wander ng

Fortune Cookie

2010-12-20T01:48:00.001-08:00

I ate lunch with some relatives at a Chinese restaurant. At the end of the meal, we got fortune cookies. My fortune cookie was the only one that had no fortune. Inside the wrapper, the cookie was already cracked, and there was no fortune in it. I interpreted this as an ominous sign. A bad omen. Illness? Death? I don't know. But it's scary.

I've been watching a lot of stand-up comedy videos on Netflix. Because that's the most logical thing to do while I edit pictures on Photoshop. I still find it tough getting the skin tones to look right. If only I could take a skin sample from everybody, so that I could match it up to what I'm seeing on my monitor. It's especially tricky when the people have been drinking, and it's been affecting their complexion. Was this guy really this red? Was he that drunk? Was I so drunk that I can't remember these details?

My photographer eye is bigger than my left eye. I just noticed the other day. I looked in the mirror, and thought it looked weird. I should get glasses that account for this difference in eye sizes.

Victory!

2010-04-03T11:17:00.001-07:00

Jogged/walked around the block with the kids for two laps. I should wear shoes next time.

Bianca asked me if I had a master's or bachelor's degree. I asked her if she would call me "master" if I got a master's. She said no. Camille said maybe. I don't think a "maybe" is enough incentive.

Camille helped me trick Soc into being distracted so that I could get her with a whoopee cushion as she sat down. Victory!

Flag Football

2010-03-27T19:45:00.000-07:00

Went to play flag football today. I only knew one other person of the whole group, so after we split into teams, I warned my team, "I should mention that I suck at football, and you should never pass it to me." They completely ignored what I said, and threw the football towards me a few times. Again and again, I failed to catch the football. Then finally, I make the catch. And I ran in for the touchdown. Woohoo!

Leprechaun

2010-03-17T18:38:00.000-07:00

The kids decided to make leprechaun traps out of popsicle sticks. Plan was to capture a leprechaun and force it to give up its pot of gold. If the leprechaun resisted, we would torture him by tickling until he submitted to our will. No leprechauns captured. Perhaps next year.

Atlanta and back

2010-03-14T22:13:00.001-07:00

Road trip to Atlanta with the parents. Our family attended the wedding of a long time friend, that was held on the covered deck of a winery during the pouring rain. I took some pictures, but don’t know how they turned out yet. Film. We’ll see. All the best to April and Edward Kim.

We visited the Georgia Aquarium, “the world’s largest with over 8 million gallons of water – the top Atlanta attraction, right in the heart of downtown.” Definitely a great experience. Hopefully I got some decent pictures. Again, film. We’ll see.

For an old man, my dad is still good with driving long distances. He and I both did roughly 7 hours each for both ways. I was going to congratulate him on a job well done when we arrived at home, but he parked in front of the wrong house. Old people.

I should write more

2010-03-09T11:45:00.001-08:00

Haven't written here for a while. I'll try to do at least once a week.

On Feb 20, it was my birthday. I'm 24 now. I wasn't planning on doing anything that day, until Todai sent me a $15 off coupon (with purchase of 2 adult dinners). So I tried to get some people to come, and I think it was a pretty good turnout. Todai itself wasn't as great as I had anticipated. I should stop trying to eat their sushi.

On Feb 19th, tried to have a pre-celebration with Camille and Bianca. Brought their favorite foods to their school lunch to eat with them. For Camille, that was Whataburger chicken strips. Then I drove to downtown Houston, bought a roasted duck, a box of roasted pork, and rice, then drove back to their school for lunch with Bianca. Sadly, Bianca's class had already gone to buy their lunches early, and were going to eat in their classroom to watch a movie. It was quite a shame. The duck and pork were still good, but I ate my part of it alone, like some sort of meat glutton.

I had some computer problems last week. Viruses. Apparently the free anti-virus software was insufficient. According to one of the scans that was performed before there was a total system failure, there was ~1000 viruses on my computer. So I had to take it into Fry's, get the whole thing reset back to factory settings, wiping out everything I had before. Then of course, I had to rummage through my piles of junk to find the driver cds for my hardware: printers and scanner. But the worst of it is, my student version of Adobe Photoshop CS4 wouldn't reinstall. I now have the 30 day trial version from the Adobe website, but will have to rebuy the program at some point. That program is expensive.

I passed the TExES content tests that I took on Feb 6th. So now, in addition to Math 4-8, I'm eligible to teach as Generalist EC-6 or Art EC-12. I just called Texas Teachers to get approval to take Science 4-8 and Science 8-12. It seems like most districts are looking to hire new science teachers, so if I pass those, it should triple my hiring potential.

Finished with all in-person and online classes for Texas Teachers. The last bit of the program, is the 30 hours of field based experience, which I'm trying to complete as fast as possible. Mostly, I've been going to Bianca and Camille's elementary school, and read stories to Camille's class.

My poems and stories are very well received by Camille's first grade class. They're always urging me to write more and more -- it's very good for my productivity. Whenever I leave, Camille gives me a big hug. And now, several of the other kids give me hugs too. Recently, I started making copies of the poems for each kid in the class so that they can read along, and read them at home. I thought it would be a good idea for them to each have a copy, instead of just hearing me read, to improve literacy and such. Today, one girl told me, "Andrew, you know the poem you gave me? I read it every night." Isn't that sweet? It feels good being able to contribute to the happiness of a child in a way that inspires imagination and furthers their education.

I started registering some of my poems for copyright, so I can distribute them for reading by the public without worry.
I created a blog that will be dedicated to the children's poems:
http://mrandrewpoems.blogspot.com/
Still not sure about a good pen name. I titled the site as Mr. Andrew, because that's what Camille's class refers to me as sometimes.

I joined the Poetry group on Facebook, the largest poetry group on the site, which boasts over 22,000 members. Of course, it seems like the group only has >20 active members, but it has been helpful in getting useful feedback and seeing all the different viewpoints and poetic styles. I'm not posting what I consider my best ones, except for the ones I have already copyrighted. Still, most of my posts seem to be well-received.
I'm glad I registered "Rosie's Toes" for copyright: "Andrew, I used your poem "Rosies Toes" in class as an example of performance poetry."

So many weddings that I'll be able to shoot at this year. March 12, April 17, April 24, Aug 14, Oct 2, Oct 9, Dec 12. All practice/portfolio building, just going to be "extra photo dude". But there's another newly engaged friend, that wants me to be her main photographer. She said she wants to have the wedding sometime in the fall. How exciting. I'm forming my team, and will launch my side business next year.

catchmeyoorimon 2:46 pm
(2:46:21 PM): can you read this proposal i wrote real quick
wander ng 2:46 pm
(2:46:28 PM): haha
catchmeyoorimon 2:46 pm
(2:46:33 PM): i wrote it so fast, i know it's super crappy
wander ng 2:46 pm
(2:46:34 PM): email: footwhoops@gmail.com
catchmeyoorimon 2:46 pm
(2:46:46 PM): i need someone to take a look before i submit
(2:46:52 PM): thanks
wander ng 2:47 pm
(2:47:41 PM): what's my time limit?
catchmeyoorimon 2:49 pm
(2:49:37 PM): it's less than one page double spaced
(2:49:44 PM): 40 min!
wander ng 2:50 pm
(2:50:03 PM): oh my gosh yoorie.
(2:50:10 PM): this feels like college again.
catchmeyoorimon 2:50 pm
(2:50:36 PM): hahahaha yes... sorry
(2:50:43 PM): im glad you were online
(2:50:54 PM): ok sent!

Meet Luke

2010-02-26T19:30:00.000-08:00

Gif maker

Wheel of Fortune

2010-02-01T20:00:00.000-08:00

So I was watching Wheel of Fortune, and the category was Before & After. The puzzle was:
_ _ _ | _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _
(The | is to denote a space. The auto formatting won't let me put extra spaces in there..)
And I'm thinking.. "THE BIG APPLE..." The first letter that the contestant guesses, is T. Which makes it:
T _ _ | _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ T T _ _.
And I say: "THE BIG APPLE FRITTER"
After a few more letters were revealed, the contestant finally solved the puzzle. But of course, I'm the real winner for guessing it first. I totally would've won that round.

Scanner

2010-01-25T02:01:00.001-08:00

I'm supposed to scan hundreds of my family's photos. And for this purpose, my Auntie Susan got me a scanner. Just installed it, and this is the first thing I tested it with.

Old photobooth strip from a photojournalism project. There are actually four images in the strip, but I didn't like the fourth one, so cropped it out.

Sweet! Pretty good film scanning too. This changes everything.

I have to clean out my room. I throw useful stuff and trash alike into a pile. It's a horrible system in which many things are lost for years at a time. If you've seen my car, you have a slight idea of what I'm talking about.

Progress

2010-01-19T02:48:00.000-08:00

I've been writing a lot of new poems for the children's book project. I'm actually seriously considering getting a few copyrighted. I'll probably start posting them in a new blog when I do that. A lot of people have been very supportive in this book venture. I also started spamming my friends trying to get feedback, and request formal analyses of grammar/punctuation. It's a very exciting prospect.

Road to becoming a teacher is also looking good. I'm already eligible for internship in a subject area that has high potential for jobs, and the training is going smoothly. Kids love me and I think that I would be a great teacher. I just need to get hired.

Another option was suggested the other day. Teach English in Taiwan. I like the idea. I think it would be fun, and a great experience. So come August, if I don't have a stable job here in Texas, I'm going to move on to the Taiwan idea. There are some people I would miss horribly.. I'll have to set up an email account for the kids if that happens..

Here are a few pictures taken by ABC using a digital SLR on fully manual. Then I photoshopped them. Someday I'll have to teach them some photoshop too.

We had a lot of fun that day.

I spontaneously got Bianca and Camille some big stuffed animals that I found at Walgreens. A monkey and a bear, both of them clearly male stuffed animals. Not that there were any anatomical distinguishing features, they just looked boyish. They name all their stuffed animals, and for these they came up with Chum Chum for the monkey, and Sally for the bear. Silly kids.

On my DSi, there's an application that allows you to record a sound and play with it. Bianca made a recording: "Andrew is awesome. Andrew is awesome. He's the craziest guy in the world. Andrew is awesome. Andrew is awesome. Yeah!" .. then the three of them were chanting that for a bit. It was great. The other recording she made: "Andrew is so, so, so, so, so, so, extremely, absolutely crazy. He will never change. Never, never, never." I also enjoy Maria's recording: "I love you Andrew!" The rest are mostly filled with random noises from all the kids.

New Best Friends

2010-01-08T08:05:00.000-08:00

I discussed it with Camille and Bianca yesterday. We're best friends now.

Camille's class enjoyed my Stomping Elephants story. I'm going to illustrate it and make it a book. I'll have to visit the zoo often to make sketches.

Bianca has a friend named Princess. While I was visiting Bianca at her school lunch.. Princess was trying to set me up with Ms. Allen. Kids are silly.

"You should marry Ms. Allen."
"Why would I want to marry Ms. Allen?"
"She's beautiful. Don't you think she's beautiful?" (Glare)
(Careful not to offend) "Yes.."
"So you think she's beautiful. I'm going to call her over here and tell her you think she's beautiful." (Raises hand)
"Bianca.. what are your friends trying to do to me?"
(Bianca laughs)
(To Ms. Allen) "He said he thinks you're beautiful."
"Oh really?"
"She said it, and I had to agree."
"Oh thank you." (Leaves)

Did some product photography for Mau on Tuesday, with a studio light I borrowed from Yoorie. I want to get more lights.

http://www.theinglenookdecor.com/

Also took some pictures of Sneha on Monday. I've been asking her to model since we were in high school. Taking pictures of beautiful people makes it a lot easier to get good pictures.

Should be able to shoot backup at about 5 weddings this year. I need to get an external flash.

The saddest thing about a good day, is knowing tomorrow will be worse.

2009-12-30T00:53:00.000-08:00

Saw the kids today. I miss them already. Those kids enjoy having me around more than anyone ever enjoys having me around. Bianca got mad at me when I left. And all I could do was look at her sad face with mine, and wish her a happy new year.

Recently I've been trying to distract myself with some videogames. A few fun gatherings with friends. I've really got to start seriously looking for a job. I've decided that anything will do for now, just something to build up my cash reserves so that I can buy materials for my creative projects. Highest priorities are finalizing my resume and sending it around to school districts, completing the online training for the alternative certification program (henceforth, ACP), and making sure I'll pass the content tests I'll be taking in February.

I finished a poem this month.

what does it mean when it seems that always in dreams i see your face?
what does it signify, what can i try to get you out of my mind?
i've been analyzed, scrutinized, hypnotized, yet i can't seem to remedy this cruel love malady.
isn't it too soon to be doomed to such emotion?
this absolute devotion is driving me mad, i can't take any more.
what is love? what is it for?
will it last? will it fade?
are you the one for whom i was made?
can you see? can you feel?
this love, so desperately real?
it consumes my thoughts, controls my brain.
makes me happy, makes me insane.
makes me weak, makes me strong.
how did i live without you for so long?
again, what does it mean?
it seems, you're the girl of my dreams.

Starts off with a haphazard internal rhyme scheme, then transitions into aabb.

Took pictures of Madelyn and Vineet this last week. I feel like I've failed Madelyn as a photographer this time around. Hopefully next time I'll have a videocamera, and we can just make a video that better captures her talent than my still photography.

Santa is coming..

2009-12-21T20:09:00.000-08:00

feel the ice crackling under your feet.
watch flakes of snow falling,
until the ivory ground they meet.
hear the children calling,
with snowballs behind their backs.
as carols are sung and bells are rung,
presents travel in great sacks,
for the stockings so carefully hung.
with houses all aglitter,
run through the fluffy slush.
the wind is sweet and bitter,
during the holiday rush.
as the cold bites at your nose,
hold close those you hold dear.
and give a hearty toast,
to the times of yesteryear.

Wrote that one a while back. I finished perusing my old online posts and compiled all the poems into a Notepad file. I ran out of free unlicensed uses of Word. A lot of bad poems, but they might still hold some useful ideas or rhymes.

I've decided that I will make a children's book. A collection of poems and stories with illustrations. Possibly some cartoons. I want to produce at least 30 poems/stories, illustrate a few, and start trying to find a publisher I can work with. Target audience will be 6-8 age group.

Just watched Avatar. You should watch it. I don't want to ruin anything, so I'll only say that the plot was intriguing and the whole thing was aesthetically pleasing.

Written on August 18, 2004

2009-12-08T14:42:00.000-08:00

And so perhaps the world was just a mistake. One incredible blunder of the fates, slowly being corrected by our systematic deaths. Who are we to try to comprehend our purpose? What makes our stubborn minds hold on to the belief that there is a point to it all? Oh how silly we are. We who ponder that divine purpose, and do nothing that could even remotely fulfill it. Slaughter of creatures to stay alive, production of toys to derive some meager entertainment, the endless toil of jobs that accomplish nothing. Society is in an endless conundrum, trying to solve the problems that it creates. Humanity itself has become self-sufficient, in that all people depend on one another. How can we question the purpose of our futures if we do not truly desire progress, but only survival? What drives our constant fixation for a greater meaning in life? If our minds be logical, what logical reason is there? Is each invidual destined to be great, to alleviate the pain of others or create tremendous advances for the whole of the world? How important could any of us really be? Not all of us could possibly be meant for greatness. Such is not the nature of things. At best, there are only a handful of people who will ever amount to anything in every generation. The purpose of all others is to support those prodigies or create competition for them, to ensure their magnificence. So what is your purpose? To go on with your pathetic life, as we all must. Perhaps when an extroardinary being rises from the masses and saves the world from itself, you will have had a hand in securing such an accomplishment. You might have cooked the food he ordered, or drove the bus she rode, maybe even lost money to them in a game of cards. And that insignificant moment in your life, that is the reason for your existence.

And we're back

2009-12-08T13:40:00.000-08:00

I've decided to write more. Somebody try to hold me to that.

I started visiting Camille and Bianca at their school lunches. It's fun, and their friends seem to enjoy my visits too. Camille wanted me to read a story to her class, and her teacher said that would be fine. Camille said that I could read any story, so I decided to make one up. The result was Rhyming Man, which I read to the class today. The class liked it, and I was also able to share some old simple poems I've had in memory. A Great Dream and Sleeping by the River. I'm sure these titles mean nothing to you, but I have them in my head, so if you're really curious I can give you a recitation. The teacher said I can come by anytime and read more stories. And she encouraged me to publish a book. That's something I've been intending to do, but think I still need more material before I can come up with a good compilation.

I'm trying to become a teacher. So far, I'm eligible for internship for Mathematics 4-8.. and will be taking content tests for Generalist E-6 and Art E-12 in February. Getting certification via Texas Teachers Alternative Certification Program.

I vaguely remembered some more poems that would be appropriate for Camille's first grade class.. so I was perusing my old Xanga account trying to find them. Made me miss writing. There are some things I had written years ago that I still find entertaining. Which is why I want to resume writing, though I can't say I will have much worthwhile material.. things are pretty dull these days.

If I wrote fortune cookies:
"Your faith in fortune cookies will be your downfall."

Rhyming Man

2009-12-05T04:11:00.001-08:00

once upon a time there lived a silly man that rhymed.
and he rhymed, nearly all the time.
he couldn't stop once an idea popped into his head.
rhyming until his face turned red..
then rhyming still more, until he fell into bed.
there was no end to the rhymes he could make,
and he never stopped, for rhyming's sake.
oh! the absurd words that he would say!
every day he found new ways to play.
because the fun of words lasts forever,
and he would never ever stop rhyming, because he liked nothing better.
he loved words more than breath, more than life.
and he would never tell her, but he loved words more than his wife.
you could probably find in his mind every possible rhyme there ever could be.
but he would say with great dismay, that there are still more rhymes to see.
for you could rhyme one word against two:
you could rhyme dismay this way and his ways of saying it were entertaining too.
whether nonsense or profound, the sounds of his rhymes were always a joy to hear.
girls and boys came from near and far, by plane and by car, to see this rhyming superstar.
but one sad day, he finally lost his voice.
don't be mad at him, it wasn't his choice.
because he couldn't rhyme, i started rhyming too.
and you should also start rhyming, because it's so fun to do.

Andrew's Gumbo

2009-09-04T00:15:00.000-07:00

stew beef
green onions
yellow onions
zucchini
squash
carrots
red potatoes
tomatoes
white mushrooms
celery
jalapenos
white cooking wine
tomato paste
creole seasoning
onion salt
garlic salt
and some water

Originally I devised this recipe as a soup. But using less water and more ingredients changed the consistency of the mixture, and I decided it was stew. Adding still more substance, I dubbed it gumbo. Realizing its true nature of being a gumbo, I've decided to add shrimp to my existing pot of gumbo tomorrow. If only it were crawfish season.

I have to get a good scanner..

2009-07-15T23:33:00.000-07:00

Been shooting in film lately. Last test run with newly acquired used film camera before doing some photos at a wedding. I won't the primary photographer, just extra photo dude trying to build a wedding portfolio. But I would still like to get some good images. Don't want to drive 6 hours, kill two days and a load of $$ for film and processing for nothing.

Anyway, Maisy's birthday party at the pool. 160 VC Kodak film. The prints came out too red. Also, during shooting, there were times when my camera was erratically not working. I hope the camera doesn't break down during crucial moments at the wedding on Saturday. That would suck.

Also, AZ Photo that I go to for film processing and prints in Houston is almost twice as expensive as Precision Camera & Video in Austin. It's ridiculous. If I do photos for my own artistic endeavors, I'll save up the film, and drive to Austin to get the prints done.

So these are the scans of the film prints. Poor quality scans. I have to get a good scanner. This is why I usually don't even bother doing flat scans.

Sometimes I stay awake just because I can

2009-07-09T01:56:00.000-07:00

Today I turn in my last paper for the last class I need at UT. Then I will graduate with a silly BA in Studio Art. There will be no celebration. Like many others, I joined the college bandwagon, took on student loans to learn things I no longer remember, and obtain a degree that will seemingly put me no closer to a better future than a roll of toilet paper.

Now I must register to take the national registry certifying exam for EMT-B. After that I'll apply to nursing schools.

Meanwhile, I volunteered to replace Bianca and Camille's daycare and watch them M-F for the rest of summer. Why? Because those kids are seriously fun. We're going to go on trips to the pool, bowling, the zoo, museums, mini golf.. whatever we feel like. Depends on how hot it is. I really don't like this heat. I think the world is getting hotter. Or we'll do art projects and create puppet shows. Kids are fun--they haven't had the joy sucked out of them yet.

Film

2009-07-07T14:30:00.000-07:00

So I've been testing out my new (used) film camera recently. I decided to try out some Fuji Pro 800z color film. I intend to use film when I take some pictures at a wedding, so assumed that the lighting situation during that would not allow for my usual 160 ISO film.

So far, I've learned:
- The shutter causes the camera to shut off sometimes when I'm shooting vertical compositions. But it seems to shoot the frame before it shuts off, so I guess it's fine.
- I should not be using these higher speed films for long exposures. Ridiculous grain in exposures longer than about 6 seconds.
- The daylight balanced film causes subjects to look significantly more yellow when used with halogen lighting.
- Several areas were overexposed. I should probably compensate by shooting down a step, at -.5 instead of 0.
- 800 ISO will probably be sufficient for the wedding, but just in case, I got a few rolls of 1600 ISO.

Movies

2009-06-26T21:31:00.001-07:00

I watched Transformers 2. Fairly entertaining. I would rate it at a 6.5 of 10.

Went to Rudy's after. Half rack of baby back ribs, 1/4th lb of extra moist brisket, small sides of cole slaw, creamed corn, and new potatoes. Approximately $18 worth of food. And ate it all single-handedly. Just kidding. I used both hands.

Went to Din Ho yesterday. Decided to try the duck, to see if it got any better in the last few years. It didn't. That duck sucked. I felt sorry for the duck.

A few minutes ago I saw a flying insect in my room. Killed it with a one-handed clap swipe. This is a no fly zone.

Think I'll start training in the martial arts. Not any specific style in particular, just create my own training regiment mixing stuff I've seen from movies and television. First thing is overall stamina building.

Class and such

2009-06-25T13:34:00.000-07:00

I should write in this more. I'll try to write in this more.

I was suspicious after I got my first essay back. My first thoughts were, "there's something wrong here." Then I got my second essay. My suspicions were confirmed. The education system is flawed. I got an A on my first essay, and then another A on my second. That's just ridiculous. I am not an A student. I feel compelled to argue for a lower grade. Oh well. What's done is done.

Here's my third essay. Just finished it. The topic is a fictitious portrait of Venus. We could interpret that and write whatever we wanted. Some people I think are going sci-fi. I decided to put mine within a historical context, set in the late 19th century.

The Lamentable Venus

In the year of 1892, I frivolously decided to visit the coast. I had always found the beaches of France quite breathtaking. The cool, crisp air tingled my senses and made my visits worth the inconvenience of the arduous journey and occasional rain showers. On this particular excursion, I found a most peculiar woman.

I had taken the long trek from Paris to arrive at the country’s northwestern coast, and upon arrival discovered a woman lying upon a large rock, looking towards the sea. She was solemnly majestic in beauty, the sun glimmering off of her nude figure as if in a glow. I was embarrassed to be looking at her, as when the eye fixates on a scene so beautiful, it feels like sin to simply witness it. Yet I was undeniably drawn towards her; by the pulsations of her heart warming my body from afar. I approached nervously, with a great fascination and inexplicable fear for the object of my destination.

When I had come closer to the woman, I realized that she had the aura of despondency and the look of pain in her face. The radiance and exuberance that I had expected to find when I saw her from afar seemed like a silly fantasy now. I could tell from her eyes, that she had been crying for a long time. I wondered if the sea itself had emerged from those woeful eyes. Out of concern, I called out to her. She looked at me with disinterest, not at all startled or concerned that an unfamiliar man had found her naked.

“Why is a creature of such beauty filled with such sorrow?” I asked her. She managed an insincere smile and replied, “Do you follow art, boy?” I answered that I knew very little of the art world, that I was somewhat disinterested with such folly. She sighed and said, “Well then, you wouldn’t understand. For it is Olympia that grieves me so.” But this was one piece even I was familiar with, so I pressed her further and asked “Why do you lament over Manet’s Olympia, a painting nearly twenty-seven years old?” She laughed with a sensation of mixed cynicism and hatred. “So even the dregs of the country know that grotesque name,” she replied. Then she began to ramble to herself, as if in a monologue, forgetting my presence.

“When Manet showed his Olympia and Christ Scourged at the Salon of 1865, it was Olympia that enraged my soul. Christ, the image of the entity that took the world from us, called us demons and condemned our followers, he that most deserves my scorn for reducing the powers of myself and my brethren… he was not as offensive as that monstrosity of Olympia! How dare Manet take a common courtesan and pose her in a way that was clearly reminiscent of one of my images. No, no, not reminiscent. It was a clear derivation from Titian’s Venus of Urbino. Like a direct affront, a mockery of my very existence! Nobody else at the time seemed to notice the reference that Manet was clearly alluding to; there was enough of an uproar due to the prostitute’s simple identity and bold gaze. But I am quite fond of Titian, and even remember when I first saw it in 1538. Oh!—What a sight that was! Thankfully, the fools these days forgot the work of that master. How I dreaded the day that the world would realize that Olympia was not simply a courtesan, but a courtesan posing as Venus! I had hoped that the painting would be lost in insignificance, forgotten with history before the world saw Manet’s diabolical intention. Alas! The atrocity was so widely discussed, criticized and praised, caricatured and copied. It was in the newspapers, journals, cartoons; even the streets of Paris were filled with talk of Olympia! Then the copies, why so many copies? First a small copy in Manet’s Portrait of Emile Zola, a critic who actually defended the value of Olympia! Then Cezanne’s A Modern Olympia in 1870, Fantin-Latour’s copy in 1883, and Gauguin’s copy from just last year! All this time I’ve been suffering. I feel like my throne in the hearts of men has been usurped. Not by a god, not by a demon, not by any of the numerous creatures of great power, but by a mere prostitute. Years from now, what will the world be painting? Venus? Or Olympia? And finally I read it in Geffroy’s writings from 1890, describing Olympia as ‘stretched out on a bed, in the foreground, in the manner of the courtesans in Venetian paintings’. The world has seen the connection. They know that Olympia the prostitute has replaced Venus the goddess. There is nothing here for me now. I cannot love, cannot live in a world where the very idea of Olympia exists. I will depart here and swim to the sea of my origin. There I’ll sink to the depths, and sleep endlessly dreaming of the days when all the world offered me their hearts.”

With that, the sorrowful, beautiful figure stood. Stupefied, I watched her dive into the sea. Her intoxicating scent disappeared with the wind. For hours I stared into the crashing waves that I saw her visage meld into. Until I had become so dazed, that I was perplexed as to whether the entire episode was a mere illusion. When I finally moved from the spot I stood, I noticed a glimmer of light from nearby the rock where the phantasm had lain. It was a hair, long and golden brown. I picked it up, and took it with me. To this day, it retains its strength and color. Most remarkably, it still smells of the beauty I met that day, a smell I can only describe as “love”.

Battlefield

2009-06-13T02:36:00.000-07:00

So I had this idea for a board game. Basically, you have an army that is composed of 5 different types of units: infantry, scout, grenadier, sniper, artillery. Movement and shooting of weapons is dependent upon rolling dice. The infantry can take more shots in one turn, scout can move more, the grenadier throws grenades at short range, the sniper can shoot farther with more accuracy, and the artillery can blow up stuff from long range. Also, there are obstacles in the terrain that you have to fight around.

Battlefield 2-4 players

Square board, grid system, 25x25 squares

There can be up to four teams: red, green, blue, and yellow.
Each team consists of six infantry, two scouts, two grenadiers, one sniper, one artillery.

Each unit has a specified moving restriction, shooting range, and shots fired per turn.
The movement and shooting range varies according to environmental conditions and chance, which is determined by rolling dice. All movement and shooting occurs in the up, down, left, or right directions. Units cannot move or shoot diagonally.
For movement of a unit, dice are rolled according to the unit type. That unit can then move a maximum of spaces equal to the dice roll.
For shooting range of a unit, dice are rolled according to the unit type. That unit can then fire in a straight line, a range equal to the dice roll.
If a unit can fire more than one shot per turn, another dice is rolled to determine the range of each shot fired.
If an enemy is within the hit range of the bullet, they roll a dice. If a 1 or 2 is rolled, the bullet has been luckily dodged. Grenades, sniper bullets, and artillery cannot be dodged.

Infantry.. (I)
Movement: Roll one dice.
Shooting range: Roll one dice. Bullets are stopped by trees and boulders.
Shots fired: Fires three shots.

Scout.. (S)
Movement: Roll two dice.
Shooting range: Roll one dice. Bullets are stopped by trees and boulders.
Shots fired: Fires two shots.

Grenadier.. (G)
Movement: Roll one dice.
Throwing range: Roll one dice. A grenade can be thrown over other units, trees, or boulders. The grenade thrown kills everyone in the space it lands, and the 8 spaces around it.
Careful! If a 1 is rolled, the grenadier is caught in the blast!
Grenades thrown: Throws one grenade.

Sniper.. (X)
Movement: Roll one dice.
Shooting range: Roll three dice. Bullets can go through the branches of one tree, but are stopped by multiple trees or a boulder.
Shots fired: Fires one shot.
Special: An enemy that is within the range of the shot fired, does not have a chance to dodge.

Artillery.. (A)
Movement: Up to two spaces.
Shooting range: Roll three dice. If a tree or small boulder is in the path of the shot fired, the shot has been stopped there, and that tree or boulder is destroyed. If the shot fired hits land, anybody in that space or the 8 spaces around it are killed.
Special: The artillery must be operated by an infantry at all times for movement and shooting. If this infantry is killed, another infantry can come to replace him. The artillery itself can only be destroyed by a grenade or another artillery unit.

Game set-up:
All players roll dice to see who goes first. Highest roll wins. Turn order continues clockwise.
In turn order, all players place one large boulder on the board (4x3 squares). Then one small boulder is placed (2x2 squares). Next, another small boulder. Players then take turns placing trees (1x1 square), until all 24 trees have been placed.
Boulders and trees cannot be placed next to the box indicating a player's starting territory.
Each player starts with their artillery and an infantry on their solid colored square. Scouts are placed outside and next to their color's territory box, next to the edge of the board. All other units are placed within their color's starting box.

Goal:
Have the strongest army remaining after 10 rounds.

Play:
During your turn, you can mobilize and attack with up to three units.
Each mobilization has up to five steps:
1. Declare the unit that will be moved.
2. Roll dice to determine maximum number of spaces the unit can move this turn.
3. Move unit desired number of spaces.
4. Roll dice to determine firing range. Repeat for multiple shots.
5. If movement spaces for the unit have not been expended, unit can finish movement.

Getting shot at:
If an infantry or scout shoots a bullet that reaches your unit, roll a dice. If a 1 or 2 is rolled, the bullet has been dodged.
Sniper bullets are instant death.
Grenades and artillery kill all units on the space of impact, and all 8 surrounding squares.

Special shooting circumstances:
The bullets of infantry, scouts, and snipers reach the first available target in the direction fired. You can't shoot through your own units. Units shot by their own side do not have a chance to dodge.
Artillery can be used to destroy trees or small boulders. Unless stopped by a tree or boulder, the artillery kills everything in its firing path.

At the end of 10 rounds of fighting, the game ends. The player with the strongest remaining army wins the game.
Strength of an army varies with each unit.
Infantry: 2 points each
Grenadier: 3 points each
Scout: 1 point each
Sniper: 4 points
Artillery: 5 points + 2 points if still operated by an infantry unit

Back at school..

2009-06-11T00:05:00.000-07:00

Currently staying in an apartment in Austin, just to finish my silly bachelor's degree. Why silly? Studio Art. I only needed one class to graduate, an upper division writing component. What did I choose? Venus and Hermes in the 19th century. Seemed useless enough.

First writing assignment: Discuss the importance of the antique world in our world today. At first I was going to say there was no significance at all. But I started thinking, and wrote about the fundamentals of democracy, philosophical thought, and rhetoric. Other people wrote about architecture, tradition of sports, and other such things. My paper got an A. There is something intrinsically flawed with the education system when I get an A. I am not an A student.

Then we did research on various representations of the beings Venus and Hermes. I chose Hermes Trismegistus, an entity that was quite intriguing. The Egyptians worshiped a god named Thoth, a god of wisdom that was the patron of astrology and alchemy. Better known, is the Greek Hermes, god of writing and magic. Both were psychopomps, meaning they guided souls to the afterlife. Anyhow, the Greeks discovered that the Egyptians were worshiping a god similar to their own, and concluded that the two gods were one and the same. Thus, Hermes Trismegistus was formed, meaning Hermes the thrice great. But the funny thing about Hermes Trismegistus, is that the beliefs of Hermeticism and the prophecies foretold by him, point directly towards Christianity. He was actually considered an Egyptian contemporary of Moses. Within Hermeticism was a trinity consisting of God, World, Man. Hermes Trismegistus was said to have foretold 'the ruin of the antique religion, the rise of the new faith, the coming of Christ, the judgment to come, the resurrection of the world, the glory of the blessed and the torments of the damned.' Pretty interesting.

I've been really lazy about meals lately. I bought the materials for my sandwiches: bread, cheese, roast beef, turkey, pastrami. But I don't actually make sandwiches anymore. I place some meat directly into my mouth, then eat a slice of bread. The key is having nothing to wash. I've also taken to eating boiled eggs. Just because there's less to wash than from frying eggs. Yesterday I bought some carrots and tomatoes. For the sake of simplicity, I eat these raw. Just rinse and eat. Every time I eat something, I eat some of my salt & vinegar chips. Food intake for yesterday: 3 boiled eggs, 1 whole carrot, 1 whole tomato, 1 slice of bread, 1 cookie, some tiny pickles, a few slices of roast beef and pastrami, chips.

I went bowling last Saturday. I'm horrible at bowling. I think I was getting better at the end though. How bad you ask? It's not even a matter of score. My gutter ball percentage is about 50%.

Lazy Recipes

2009-06-03T17:19:00.000-07:00

Place aluminum foil onto oven pan.
Place chicken thigh onto aluminum foil.
Season with garlic salt.
400 degrees for 30 minutes.

EMT Clinical Rotation

2009-04-27T22:13:00.000-07:00

EMS
5/4 Westlake 6am-6pm
5/6 Westlake 6am-6pm

Hosp/ER
5/11 BTH 3pm-11pm
5/14 BTH 7am-3pm

Meat Dudes

2009-04-20T00:07:00.001-07:00

So Soc mentioned that Camille eats at Todai for free. I hadn't been there after they remodeled and changed their menu. I ask them if I can take Camille to Todai, and they say sure. I'm thinking she would be good free entertainment while I stuff myself silly. Bianca says "Oh I love Todai!". I look at her and say, "But you're not free." I didn't expect this to happen anytime soon.

Next day, I'm heading over to their house for the usual playing and whatever; I get a call from Soc asking if I'm going that day. I tell her I'm on my way; and she said that if I wanted to go to Todai, she would give me money for Bianca so I could take both kids--if I thought I could handle them both. So we decide I'll take the kids to Todai, but Camille starts saying she doesn't want to go to Todai. She wants to go to China Bear or Chik-fil-a. But we don't want to go to those places, we want to go to Todai. She starts crying. Then she says she wants to go to Katy Mall. Why? She wants to get a grape tapioca drink from Teahouse. This we can accomodate. I decide we'll go to a Teahouse and get her grape tapioca drink, but after we go eat. Then as they're getting changed and ready to head out, I think of an idea to add to the fun. We would go to Dave & Busters and have them pick out prizes to spend my remaining coupon credits.

Thus, we went to Todai. Camille mostly ate a lot of noodles, some chicken, and baby corn. Bianca ate a good amount of food, especially the barbecue meat. They had waiters whose sole purpose was to walk around the tables with Churrascaria barbecue meat on skewers, and cut off pieces for you to eat. I would like to mention at this point, that this concept is genius. There should be meat dudes everywhere. Anyway, the food was very satisfying. I think there will be many more food outings to come. At the young age of 8, Bianca gets an excited, ravenous look on her face when she sees the meat walking near her. It's like the look the kids must have had in Lord of the Flies when they were roasting the pig. She said, "I feel sorry for the cows, but this is really good."

Then we went to Dave & Busters, played a few games, and chose a few prizes. Bianca took forever because she couldn't decide. She said she didn't want to waste it on things they could buy in the grocery store. And said that she really wants a stuffed animal, but knows that once she takes it home and plays with it for a day, she won't want it anymore. Very careful consumer. When we return to my car, I realize I don't have my cell phone, and that it must have fallen out of my pocket at some point in D&B, since I used it a few times in there. So I bring us back inside to do a search, to no avail. I think I'll go without a cell phone for a while.

Went to Teahouse. Camille got grape, I got mango, and Bianca got cappuccino. She said she likes to stay awake. They started playing Battleship, but after I finished my drink, I decided we would just go because their game would take forever.

We return to the house, and I continue my Monopoly duel with Bianca. She was winning for a while, but I'm making a comeback. We're playing straight up Monopoly, no house rules. Early on, I was buying everything I could by any means, and ended up having most of my properties mortaged. Essentially, I was depending on Go for most of my income, and unmortaging as my funds would allow. After a long time, Bianca bought up her own monopoly of the reds, and I told her she could buy houses there. She decides to buy one on Disney World (equivalent of Illinois, we're playing the electronic banking version). She can afford to buy a lot more, which would have killed me if she did, but she didn't want to buy more houses. And I decided to not advise her against that decision. Finally, my just-pass-Go strategy allows me to open all my properties, and accumulate a bit of money. I offer a trade of Mediterranean and Park Place (I can only remember the original property names) for her Vermont; essentially getting the light blue monopoly in exchange for giving her the purple and blue monopolies (she turned down the Park Place for Vermont offer). I immediately hotel up, sinking my monetary funds to less than $100. She decides to only build one house each on the purple properties. After I gained enough money to handle another monopoly, I made a trade that gave her the orange monopoly and gave me the magenta monopoly. I hotel up, and she builds a few more houses on purple. At this point I'm in the lead with money, but as we were recording the status of the game and cleaning up, she said she would build on her blue next. If she actually starts building more houses and hotels on her multiple monopolies before my two sets of hotels take her down, I'm going to lose. I'll have to explain to her the best strategies of how to win. The next time, after the current game is over.

Girls

2009-04-18T21:55:00.000-07:00

So I'm in HEB with B and C. A woman with four young kids comes by, three boys and the youngest a girl.
She says, "You only have two kids?"
I reply, "Oh no, these are my cousin's kids."
"Oh not even."
"You have four kids?"
"Yeah."
"What did you do that for?"
"Her."

I don't like writing essays.

2009-04-12T23:59:00.000-07:00

A person's perspective changes when they are holding a camera. The mind's method of evaluating the environment around them becomes more intricate and complex. Usually, under normal circumstances, thoughts about a person's surroundings will revolve around their path towards the destination they are trying to reach, and possible threats to their safety. As we're driving, we look for signs and landmarks, the relative positions of the cars around us, the weather conditions, and other possible hazards. But a photographer is different. In addition to normal cognitive thought processes, they evaluate every speck of color, every line, shape, form, and the way that light illuminates them, creating highlights and shadows. Relationships between objects and then the relationship they have with the rest of the environment are evaluated. And after the photographer quickly and meticulously scrutinizes everything from where they are, they simulate in their mind what the entire scene would look like from another position--where all the relative angles and apparent sizes of everything are different. When the scene has been analyzed from every possible angle, everything is reconsidered and a general idea of lighting changes and their effects on the scene are formed, as the mind simulates movement of the sun and time of day. This is how people with cameras think and see, because they are always looking for something of interest to capture. There was one instance while I had my camera in which I saw something of great interest.

I was walking out of the ART building around midday, and saw an intriguing design of lights that shone through the vestibule from the sunlight outside. I went through the inner door to stand within the vestibule, which was composed of glass panels on opposing sides with glass doors, and brick walls on the other two sides. The metallic frames that encased the glass panels were forming shadows on the floor tiles, with the areas between the shadows brightly illuminated by the sun. And looking into the glass towards the interior of the building, the reflection of the rest of the vestibule and the world outside could be seen meshed translucently in front of the image of the inner building. There were reflections within the reflections, and highlights on top of highlights. Merging the image within the reflection and the image through the reflection created a scene that was altogether more fascinating than either image would be separately.

I later realized that the situation I was physically in, was a visual metaphor for life. I now take the vestibule between the walls of glass to represent the present, where we all stand. Looking towards the future, or the outside, inevitably we must consider reflections or experiences of the past behind us. The past and future are intrinsically linked, and we are always standing in the nexus. The concept that was most significant in this realization, was that the reflection was entirely different from the image beyond the glass. In other words, though the past may significantly affect our thoughts of the future at present, we can look through the past and work to arrive at a future that is different. The work in that situation would be simply opening the door, but initiating change in life would be more difficult. I learned that despite my mistakes and past situation, I could still look towards and strive for any future without restriction.

Acting upon this new mindset, I began to delve into career paths that were completely unrelated to everything I had done before. Finally I arrived upon a path I have decided to pursue--emergency medical care. I'm currently taking a class to become an EMT-B, and intend to enter paramedic school next. Ideally, I will be spending my life saving lives, and working on photography in between. I have prepared for further photographic study by changing the fundamental ways I think and see, which changes everything.

.. probably too long. I hope there's not a short word limit.

Essay topic

2009-03-25T19:31:00.000-07:00

I have to reapply to UT. And I actually have to write an essay. Argh.

Personal interaction with objects, images and spaces can be so powerful as to change the way one thinks about particular issues or topics. For your intended area of study (architecture, art history, design, studio art, visual art studies/art education), describe an experience where instruction in that area or your personal interaction with an object, image or space effected this type of change in your thinking. What did you do to act upon your new thinking and what have you done to prepare yourself for further study in this area?

Silhouettes

2009-03-10T02:32:00.001-07:00

"Bob, the boss would like to speak with you in his office."

What? Me? I've never even spoken with the boss before. The day I was hired by the company, his secretary simply shoved a box of projects into my hands as she welcomed me with a dull tone. I soon learned that the boss was an eccentric and anti-social. Most of the other architects in our firm had never seen him either. There were several whispered rumors of why he was never seen. Some said he was a cripple or had a hideous deformity that he wanted to hide. Others say he uses his office as a brothel, and that various women were secretly transported via hidden passages. Ridiculous theories. I had always entertained the idea that he was just sitting in his office wearing pajamas, drinking beers, and watching television. If I had an office, that's what I would do.

When everyone overheard that I was summoned, they all looked at me with varying expressions. There were faces of jealousy, pity, and surprise. They thought I was being promoted, getting fired, or were as confused and perplexed as I was. Just to give them a show, I raised both arms in triumph. I rolled my chair out away from my desk, stood up, and jumped onto my chair. I did two full spins before I violently fell down towards my desk, and broke my lamp. I regained my composure, and gave a short speech. "I have been chosen. It has been a pleasure working with all of you." Again, my arms were raised in triumph as I walked towards the elevator. I kicked the up button, and turned to face my peers, who were all staring bewildered. When I heard the elevator arrive, I bowed graciously and stepped inside. That should give them an interesting story to tell.

Inside the elevator was a mother with her son, young kid about the age of three. Our firm shares the building with several businesses, among them include various clothing retailers. Seemed like the kid hadn't experienced many elevators before. While we ascended, the boy bent his knees to steady himself. When the elevator stopped, he was somewhat disoriented, but looked up at his mother and smiled. As the doors opened and he found himself in an entirely new place, he exclaimed with excitement, "How did we get here?" The two walked out of the elevator. With a frantic voice I shouted, "Why did you get off!? That place is Hell!" I heard the kid crying and the mother screaming profanity as the doors closed. They must have been Catholic.

I reached the top floor, where the boss keeps his office. Nice view, if you like to see things from 60 stories up. But I'm afraid of heights and am very pessimistic. I avoided the very large windows, for fear of tripping into a window, shattering it to pieces, and subsequently falling towards a bloody death. The secretary was at her desk, on a business call. I sat down in a chair and picked up a magazine to read as I waited. Just as I flip to the first page, a pen comes flying at my head. I look up, and the secretary signals for me to knock at the door behind her. Though a bit annoyed by the projectile throwing secretary, I decided it would be best to not take vengeance. I knocked at the door, and heard a voice inside tell me to come in.

With great nervousness, I opened the door and walked inside. There, a muscular man with an intimidating stature stood with arms folded in front of a large desk. When I met his gaze, he smiled. "So, do you feel like you've accomplished enough in your life?" he asked. With little thought, I replied, "No. I don't feel like I've accomplished anything at all. My life thus far has been meaningless." He walked up to me and shook my hand. "Bob, if you're ready, we can change your life."

.. to be continued.

23

2009-02-27T21:37:00.001-08:00

So I turned 23 on February 20th. Spent the day with my cousin's family, and the next night with some friends.

I thought it would be mostly like any other day, as I have been visiting my cousin's family 2-5 times a week.. for the last 7 months or so. Figured the kids would say "Happy birthday!" once and we would just play as usual. But the day was filled with cheers, songs, and acrobatic performances that were dedicated to me for my birthday. It was really cute. So it was Bianca, Camille, and the neighbor's kid. Which is one of those indicators that I visit too much. For dinner, I barbecued the steak I brought, and Edward cooked some vegetables and egg drop soup.. which we ate with some champagne. Soc got a chocolate cake with strawberries, and also melted chocolate to cover strawberries, pretzels, and marshmallows. They stuck two candles in the cake and sang the birthday song. As I inhaled, two of the kids blew out the candles. That was probably for the best, since I couldn't think of a good wish. They also got me a Rubiks cube and Etch-A-Sketch, both of which are very awesome. That was probably the best birthday yet.

I often ask Bianca and Camille if they're tired of me yet. They always say no. I told Bianca I could either get a job, or continue to visit them when I can. I let her decide. When summer comes, I'll be in Austin. After that, I'll be working full time and taking paramedic classes. I'm going to miss those kids.

Camille: I wanna dance like a maniac.

Andrew: Bye Camille!
Camille: Bye? You've been here for like 2 hours.
Andrew: Really? 2 hours? I think I've been here for four days. (And it had actually been 6 hours that day.)

Let's see, in other news:
-I found out that I can take the paramedic class directly after the EMT-B class and that the EMT-I class isn't necessary. So I could potentially be working as a paramedic by this time next year.
- I've updated my modelmayhem account and will be trying to use models from that network for my creative ideas. Working with just people I know (or randomly find in person) is too slow, as most of my people are in a different city or keep claiming they're too busy.
-I'll probably move to California once I have some money together. I'm guessing it will be 2-3 years.
-I thought up a new art project. Freeze small flowers in a thin layer of water, repeat several times to create a block of ice with flowers throughout. Then carve into sculptures.
-Photography business will begin as soon as I finish editing past shoots. Class has gotten busy, so progress is a bit slow.

Pictures

2009-02-22T23:24:00.001-08:00

Getting better at editing.

Old Writing

2009-01-29T23:35:00.001-08:00

Looking for something in my old Xanga account. A link to a video I made for class a while back. I wonder where it is. Anyway, came across this entry and thought it would be good to repost it for later.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Watched over little cousins. Arrived at their house around 8:15am. When I got in, Camille came down from the stairs without a word and gave me a hug. Cute kid. Four years old. Generally shy around a lot of people. She's fun when there's less people though, gets a bit hyper. Like a monkey.

Bianca and Camille gave me a tour of their house. Showed me the humongous blue bear I gave to Bianca a few years ago. I asked if they knew where they got it from, and she didn't remember. It was for her birthday when she was turning three; she's six now. I thought it was funny then because the bear was about as large as she was.

Makes me wonder, if I don't see them for a while, would they forget me completely? How many memories have already faded? Not just with them, but everybody that I have known. I remember experiences with people that have probably forgotten my existence.

I suppose that's one of the reasons I'm interested in photography. I can remember some images from the past, in clips and hazy vignettes. But it isn't complete, and some of the others don't remember it as well. The pictures help me piece everything together, and show people how I saw it. So then the memories will never be completely gone, there will always at least be that one frame, that one instant. Images of people, images of the world.

Maybe in three years Camille will forget everything from this time. How she hugged me when she awoke, spun around as I carried her and danced, or how she said goodbye with so much sadness that it was hard for me to leave. Bianca is older, so her memories from now will last longer. Yet it worries me still.

I'm beginning to discover an urgency for portrait photography. If only for my own sake. With growth and death, a person doesn't look the same after great expanses of time. I suppose it's morbid, but I want to get good pictures of everyone I know while I have the chance. In the way in which I see them. I don't necessarily have to be the photographer, but some people don't have pictures of themselves that adequately portray my vision of them. Kids grow fast, so they're the highest priority, right under those that are close to death.

But in any case, there are some people that I would like to do a photographic study on. A documentation of sorts, with pictures at least every few months. More of a scientific approach in observing the visual growth, and also the development of emotions that can be evoked from the images after the years.

Sometimes I regret being the one behind the camera. Years from now they'll have the picture and know they were there, but there's no visual trace of the photographer. I want to start getting more pictures of myself with people, but I don't trust many people for the task. I suppose there will always be that problem.

Of course the picture isn't the person or experience, but it's something. And if I can pursue all these ends through photography, not all will be forgotten. I will leave what memories I can and share my vision--a fool's idealistic world of happiness and beauty.

Pictures

2008-12-31T16:20:00.000-08:00

So we had the long awaited Madelyn shoot this month. I also did some pictures in film of various things. And since I don't have a decent scanner, those film shots may never enter the world of the internet. Suffice it to say, I'm improving. Most recently in portraiture and street photography.

Anyway, the Madelyn shoot was done in digital, so I'll post a few of my favorites here. For more, visit my album on Facebook. Action shots somewhere in downtown. Then tattered black clothes against a dark background, which we actually had to do in my cousin's house. Kids came home while we were cutting the clothes on Madelyn, which wasn't nearly as awkward as I thought it would be. A lot of prep time, but I think it was worth it.

Next creative idea: figures fading into the background. I have to buy some make up.

Funny things kids say

2008-12-31T15:19:00.000-08:00

Bianca (8) and Camille (6)

Bianca: Andrew, what kind of kid are you going to have?
Andrew: I don't know. What kind of kid do you think I should have?
Bianca: You should have a girl. So we can hang out with her.
Camille: Yes! A girl!
Andrew: Don't you think that by the time I have kids, you'll be too old to hang out with them?
Bianca: No. I plan on living a very long time. Like 96 or something.
Camille: Yeah, me too. I'm going to live a long time.

Andrew: Do you think I should cut my hair?
Bianca: No!
Camille: No.
Andrew: Why?
Bianca: Your bangs looks really cool. (Makes two peace signs.)

Bianca: What are you eating?
Andrew: Do you know what lamb is?
Bianca: Of course I know what lamb is.
Andrew: That's what I'm eating.
Bianca: Animal cruelty! .. But I like lechon (roasted pig) and chicken. And also duck, I love duck. And cow, I love cow.

Bianca: You were late. We've been waiting for you all day.
Andrew: Really? How long have you been waiting?
Bianca: Since 12:42.
Andrew: Wow that's very specific. That's a long time. I told you I would be coming at night. That's not night time.
Bianca: Yeah. We were waiting for you this whole time. We thought you might have forgotten about us.
Andrew: You're silly. Why didn't you call then? You never called.
Bianca: We told mom to call at 12:50 but she didn't.

Andrew: What's your favorite commercial?
Bianca: Swivel Sweeper, right Camille?
Camille: Yeah! The Swivel Sweeper.
Andrew: Do you have one?
Camille: No.
Andrew: Do you think you should get one?
Camille: Yes.
Bianca: We have the mop Swivel Sweeper.
Camille: Yeah, we have the mop one.
Andrew: Oh cool.
Bianca: Every kiss begins with Kay..

Bianca sees a piece of trash near the sidewalk, as we ride bikes toward the park.
Bianca: Oh my gosh! They should have recycled.
Andrew: That's horrible. Maybe we should get a garbage bag and throw it away later.
Bianca: Yeah. At school, if I see trash on the playground, I throw it into the trashcan. And I never throw trash on the ground.
Andrew: That's good.
Bianca: We have to save our planet.

Clay

2008-12-12T18:57:00.001-08:00

Internet is out at my house. Been using cousins' places to check email and such. Got a library card today. The library down the street from my house is closed for repairs, so I went to the one on Eldridge. Maybe I should also borrow some books and movies.

I got Bianca (8) and Camille (6) to make lists of things they want for Christmas. Research for my aunt. Anyway, one of the things on Bianca's list was clay. I went over to Texas Art Supply and got her a big block of clay. Not Play-Doh, not Model Magic, real red clay that actual artists use. It also happens to be toxic if you inhale the dust of the dried clay. But it's ok, I wrote her some instructions for safety and proper use. Also got the basic set of tools, a bucket, and plastic to put the clay on. The great thing about clay is that if you don't let it dry out completely, it's endlessly reusable. I brought it to her today and we started playing. I never give them gifts on time, I had already given Camille a set of 120 crayons a few days ago. Showed Bianca how to make a coil pot. She attempted a mug, then she made a girl's head. Camille was very messy. She didn't make anything but blobs of clay, and she called it something different every time.

Camille sometimes uses expressions that don't make complete sense in the context in which she uses them. When I gave her the 120 box of crayons and a oversized coloring book, she said "How dare you get me so many crayons!" To which I replied, "If there's too many, I can take them all back." And she said, "No no no! I'll keep them!"

Visiting those kids is always fun. The other day, I rang the doorbell, and Camille started shouting "It's Andrew! It's Andrew!" Then Bianca and their friend (from next door that was visiting) started shouting too. When I went inside, Camille was jumping up and down, like she had won the lottery. Nobody else ever greets me like that.

I bought Blokus Trigon. It's fun. You should play with me.

Today I saw The Day the Earth Stood Still. I thought it was a surprisingly good movie. You should go watch it.

I thought of an alternative life plan. Basically, I work odd jobs until I can pay off my student loans. Then I save up some dollars, and move to the Philippines. Live on the beach, eating fish and drinking coconut juice for sustenance.

HoneyBaked Ham is really bad about scheduling. Monday I get a call at 10:30am "Can you come in to work?" "Ok.", so I go work for a few hours. Manager says "I'll call you later with the schedule". Tuesday didn't work, drove grandfather to a hospital visit, no calls. Wednesday I get a call at 11:15am "Did they not tell you to come in to work today?" "No." "Can you come in to work for a while?" "Ok." When I go home, he says "Come in at 9:30am tomorrow." "Ok." I wake up on Thursday to go to work, I'm driving to the store, and I get a call "Don't come in to work today, we're training a few new people." "Ok." and I'm thinking this was worse than when they randomly woke me up to work (if I have nothing to do, I sleep until 1-2pm). Later that day, I call in to see if I'm working the next day "No, you're not working tomorrow." And sure enough, they called me Friday (today) at 9:30am "Can you come in to work today?" "What? How long? They said I wasn't working today." "Oh. How about tomorrow, can you work tomorrow?" "What time tomorrow?" "Hold on, let me see." (On hold a minute) "Ok we'll call you about next week." Ridiculous.

Day trip

2008-12-07T01:38:00.000-08:00

I spent a long time driving today. Beaumont and back. About 2 hours each way. Drove across the Trinity River to get there. First time I did that. I found the view more intriguing than that of driving across the Colorado River, which is on the way to Austin. Made the trip to do a photo shoot. Just classic portraiture, didn't try anything new or creative. But it was a good shoot, a lot of shots that they liked. Either I'm improving in the field of portraiture, or I keep picking people that any monkey could take good pictures of.

When we were done, went to dinner with them at a Thai place. Probably wasn't a good idea to order something so spicy that I had to drink a lot of water. Then drive back for two hours full of liquids and a strong "need to urinate" sensation. Had to stop at two gas stations on the way back.

After I finish editing the rest of Ling's pictures, I'll have several more hours of pictures to edit. How fun.

And finally the long awaited Madelyn shoot is coming soon. If she becomes famous, I'm going to latch onto that fame by taking her pictures and having her recommend me to other celebrities. This is one of my "leeching" plans.

I replaced my oil paints so that I can start on my new painting. But it seems I won't have time for that in a while. A lot of photography obligations now, and I still have a charcoal drawing that I was supposed to do for my aunt. Also trying to learn some basic baking skills, which I can't do on the same day that I have done any painting. Oil paints and the paint thinner is fairly toxic, and
the smell of it lingers even after I wash my hands thoroughly.

Recently, I attempted to make a cake . Angel food cake with a cream cheese frosting. In the frosting I mixed in chopped strawberries, raspberries, and blackberries. I had one of my testers try it. The cake failed, but the frosting was good. Next time I want to try a cheesecake.

Today I played a board game called Blokus Trigon. This is a great game. I will purchase it. You will play with me.

Seattle

2008-11-20T22:44:00.000-08:00

Well, I went to Seattle last week. From November 13th-18th. Main reason for this trip was to see my grandmother before she dies. We don't know how long we can expect her to live, but I don't like to act on the optimistic side of things, so I decided to see her as soon as possible.

She's actually still well enough to function normally, but she's lazy. All she does is lay in her bed and get up for meals or the bathroom. We've been telling her that she should be more active and eat more so that her health doesn't decline further, but she's quite obstinate. For a while, she would go to the senior center, and we assumed she was taking part in the exercises. But she told Auntie Jane that it was very tiring for her to sit and watch the old people do exercises. Ridiculous. Anyway, she's using oxygen tanks to supplement her breathing and will start on chemotherapy soon.

Grandpa's lifestyle is the same: eat and sleep. He likes to go to the casino and play the video slots. But he doesn't really understand what's going on, so we often have to tell him which button to press. Since I was watching him for a while, I decided I might as well put in a few dollars in the machine I was sitting at, and senselessly press the button for a while. Then I was mesmerized by turning my $20 into $100, and kept playing. I thought to myself, "I will stop when I have a profit of $100." Of course I lost it all before that happened, and was hooked on the silly machine for a while. Then I tried to make up for the loss by playing blackjack, which didn't pan out very well either. Next time, no machines.

So grandpa liked my beef/chicken/vegetable soup. I cooked for them that Friday, and made a huge pot of it. For lunch, I gave him a bowl, and couldn't figure out whether he liked it or not. My poor Chinese and his poor English creates a situation in which we have very poor communication. But when he finished his bowl, he motioned for more, so I gave him another bowl. About three hours later, he came out to have more soup. And two hours after that, more soup again. Auntie Jane and Uncle Rocky liked it too. I was told it was "very healthy and delicious".

I took a picture of the grandparents, and got a picture of myself with grandma. Simple straight-on portraits, nothing fancy. Haven't taken any good pictures of them recently because they're usually opposed to taking pictures.

We went to Pike's Market and walked around the pier. I think Seattle would be a nice place for me to live. Fresh fish and seafood. And I prefer colder climates. Scenery is really nice too. During the fall there's a brilliant landscape of greens, reds, oranges, yellows, and browns.

Phones

2008-11-10T12:52:00.000-08:00

I started a part time job. Therefore, I am now only a part time bum.

Working at HoneyBaked Ham until Christmas. Handling phone calls mostly. Think I would be better suited for a task that requires less human interaction. I dread phone calls. Whenever I'm not talking on the phone, I stare at it and hope it doesn't ring. Also, sometimes when I'm on a phone call and the customer is being needlessly talkative, I'm very tempted to just hang up.

So the new plan is to finish the Studio Art degree at UT this spring or summer. If I can't find a decent drafting job soon after that, I'll go to UH for mechanical engineering. Apparently if I have a degree already, it's automatic acceptance.

Going up to Seattle from Nov 13th-18th to visit grandmother. She was recently diagnosed with lung cancer in its final stages.

Shadows and Silhouettes

2008-11-04T23:21:00.000-08:00

they are but shadows and silhouettes,
full of shame and regrets.
sinning and repenting,
hopelessly unrelenting.
acting upon greed and lust,
doing whatever they must.
crime and violence;
have they no conscience?
but they know not what they do--
if only that were true.
it's a sad conclusion
of the mind's utter confusion.
yet they are always aware.
always some sense and logic there.
so don't trust what they say,
they'll lie to get their way.
but not all are ruled by vice.
some are moral, some are nice.
though often hard to find,
a few are honest and kind.
they can dry your tears,
help battle your fears.
fight injustice and hate,
save themselves before it's too late.
they are demons and saints,
slight differences of emotional restraint.
a struggle that knows no rest,
they are but shadows and silhouettes.

Candy machine

2008-11-02T20:24:00.000-08:00

I thought up a new way to pick up the kids and turn them upside down. Works best with Camille. Starts with her laying face up. With one of my hands, I hold onto both of her hands, and with my other hand, I grab her ankle. Then I lift her up, and swing her like a pendulum. At one end, it's like I'm holding her standing in the air. On the other end, she's completely upside down. For the final swing, I let go of her ankle and she ends up standing. However, due to being disoriented, she usually falls right over. She thoroughly enjoyed it, and when I put her down, she said that we would call it "the candy machine". I'm not sure how the name makes any sense. I asked her why we would name it that, and she said "because it's awesome". Due to the height difference, it doesn't work as well with Bianca. Instead of grabbing the ankle, I use my forearm to support her legs under her knees.

If you try to attempt this with a kid you know, be sure to watch their head so that you don't swing it into the ground or a wall.

Afterwards, my shoulders were sore for a long time. Good strength exercise. The only upper body exercise I ever get is lifting up those kids and spinning/flipping/throwing them around. I intend to do more exercise soon. Mostly running. Need to increase stamina.

Chicken and mushrooms

2008-10-31T22:38:00.000-07:00

Today I tried out my latest idea. The essential idea is balls of mushroom and chicken, with cheese in the middle, and deep fried. I used feta cheese, chopped garlic and green onions, and that was mixed with mayo to create a paste. Then chopped up some mushrooms and chicken, and smashed it all together to form balls. After that, added creole seasoning. This was the great flaw of the entire process. The end product turned out to be too salty, so I shouldn't have added the creole seasoning. Anyway, I refrigerated that for a while, then floured and deep fried. First attempts, like I had feared, quickly fell apart. The cheese-mayo paste was useless in keeping the structure together. Luckily I found a metal gravy spoon that was perfect for holding the chicken-mushroom ball, so was able to retain the shape as it was fried. Since this was severely inefficient cooking one at a time, I only did two like that and baked the rest in the oven.

The results, as I mentioned were too salty. However, other than that, they were good. I noticed a saltiness difference between the baked and fried versions. The fried ones tasted significantly more salty than the baked. I'll have to remember that for future experiments.

Probably won't attempt this specific idea again. Though the idea seemed good, it just wasn't satisfying. I still think there's potential for the combination of chicken, mushroom, feta cheese, garlic, and green onions. Perhaps a pizza would be the best method (also adding olives, tomatoes, and spinach). Or within a nice bread, like a croissant.

Think I'll make my spicy beef and vegetable soup next week. Quite healthy; and tasty too. I'll need to take in more nutrients than I have been if I want to do more training. Mostly working on running.

An uneventful Halloween again. Perhaps I'll actually make a costume for next year. I'm thinking Iron Man. And I'll also try to think of a design for a Transformer, which was a request. I'm sure I could do it, but I usually get very lazy about my creative projects. I have a few requests from years ago yet to be fulfilled.

Tricks

2008-10-21T20:57:00.000-07:00

So today we discovered that Camille can hold my hands, climb up my legs, stomach, and chest to have me suspend her upside down, then continue the rotation to essential do an assisted back flip. This also works with Bianca as well, but is a bit harder due to the differences in height and arm length. With Camille, I can also lift her up as she ascends, so that instead of ending upside down, she climbs onto my shoulders. I wonder if she would be able to jump off onto the ground from there. If I'm about 5' 7", then my shoulders should be around 4' 6" or so. That's relatively high considering her height, but she would probably do it. She's like a monkey.

I made some hash today. I think that's what I'll call it. Red potatoes, zucchini, yellow onion, green onion, garlic, olive oil, garlic salt. Chopped up and cooked in a large frying pan, then added cheese when done. Made a large batch and ate some for lunch. Then brought the rest to Edward's house. Edward and Soc tested it and liked it. Bianca and Camille didn't try any. Since the refrigerated and reheated batch got good reviews, I consider this latest creation a success. Yay.

Here's a picture of myself and Bianca. Taken by cousin Marlon during the last party. Marlon recently took up photography a few months ago, and has better gear than me. I worked through it in Photoshop a bit; cropped, color adjustments, brightness and contrast, then some excess editing for effect. Best picture I have with Bianca. I visit them often, but we're usually too busy playing so I don't even bring a camera. Think I'll do some portraits of them next week.

Television

2008-10-18T15:12:00.000-07:00

During dinner, Bianca sang along with a commercial on television.
"You watch too much tv. How many commercials can you sing along with?"
"I don't know. Sometimes I want to say, 'Star Furniture! The sale of the year!' "

So our friends' kid's birthday party was at Zube Park. When did Sam Houston Tollway become $1.50? That's crazy. Filipino parties are nice. There's always good food. Sometimes there are oddities like beef swimming in pig's blood (which I have yet to try), but there's never a shortage of good food. Zube Park has a miniature train for people to ride on, which goes through part of the park. I rode this train twice, watching over a kid. I think it would have been more fun if I were allowed to stand up and attempt to maintain a surfing pose for the duration of the trip.

Pink, red, yellow, and green

2008-10-17T00:04:00.000-07:00

My new recipe!

Ingredients:
salmon, red potatoes, squash, zucchini, garlic, green onions, garlic salt, lemonade, olive oil, shredded cheese

Directions:
-Slice red potatoes, squash, and zucchini into thick half-circles
-Finely chop garlic and green onions
-Place the salmon into a baking pan. Surround salmon with red potatoes, squash, and zucchini. Spread chopped garlic and green onions throughout.
-Pour about one cup of lemonade into the pan. This is for flavor and to keep the salmon moist.
-Drizzle olive oil over salmon and vegetables.
-Season everything with garlic salt.
-Bake in oven at 375º for 25 minutes. Take out of oven to remove most of the liquid. Leave enough to fully cover the bottom of the pan. Return to oven, and bake until vegetables are all fully cooked.
-After vegetables are done, add shredded cheese on top. Whichever cheese you prefer. The best combination for the dish is probably mozzarella or swiss. Bake until cheese melts.
-Serve warm.

Amount of each ingredient used is dependent upon your personal taste. Be sure that your salmon has been scaled, and that you thoroughly wash all produce.

Comedic love poem

2008-10-09T20:58:00.000-07:00

i'll be yours,
if you'll be mine.
be there for you
anywhere, anytime.
and if you decide
to keep me by your side,
you need not worry at all.
i'll catch you if you fall,
hold you tight
if you're scared at night,
wipe your tears if you cry.
and if a villain should try
to treat you poorly,
they will regret it sorely.
for their head will meet
my fists and feet.
and they will bleed
until their pupils recede.
then none will ever dare
to holler at you or stare.
we'll be happy and feared.
it will be lovely, my dear.
i'll be yours,
if you'll be mine.
be there for you
anywhere, anytime.

Rejected

2008-10-09T16:27:00.000-07:00

"Dear Andrew (wanderng),

Thank you for taking the time to apply as a contributor with iStockphoto.com.

The iStock administrators have asked that you upload new samples based on the feedback provided below. You're welcome to return in 3 days, upload some new samples and we'll re-process your application.

Comments from the iStockphoto Administrator:

At this time we regret to inform you that we did not feel the overall composition of your photography or subject matter is at the minimum level of standard for iStockphoto. Please take some time to review training materials, resources and articles provided through iStockphoto. The photographs provided in your application should be your best work. Try and impress us, we want to see how you stand out from the crowd.

We welcome you to return in the number of days specified and upload 3 fresh samples of your work and we will re-process your application.

For more information on Composition and Impact, please see:
http://www.istockphoto.com/article_view.php?ID=13

For more information on Suitable Stock Photography, please see:
http://www.istockphoto.com/article_view.php?ID=146

Thank you for your time and effort.

Best Regards,
iStockphoto.com"

...

So, these are the photos I submitted for samples. I think these are better than some of the photos they have up there. Oh well.

Old pictures

2008-10-08T21:03:00.000-07:00

Working on editing my old film scans. The scanner picked up a lot of dust/scratches/artifacts in the images, so I have to digitally brush over those areas to make it look right. It's very tedious, and takes a long time. But when I finish, I can make a nice poster-sized print.

Here is one of the pictures I'm working on.

I believe this was from the end of winter in 2007, UT's ART building.

Others are night shots from around Sugar Land. I have to clear out more room on my computer.. because it keeps telling me the virtual memory is low.

This morning I sent in an application to sell photos from istockphoto.com .. if that goes through, hopefully I can make a bit of cash through that. Stock photography is taking photos that will be used by other people/designers however they see fit (within certain copyright limitations) in their designs/photo illustrations. Problem is, I never really take photos with the intention of them being used for stock photography. I photograph complete compositions, that are often not ideal for further post-processing. Still, worth a try and maybe I'll get a wider audience looking at my work.

I had an idea of organizing photography road trips. Gather some photographers, and drive. Stop whenever somebody sees something worth taking a picture of. I have a few people that are interested. So after I get a job and acquire the necessary funds, we'll get the actual plans going.

Kids

2008-10-04T15:54:00.000-07:00

The other day, Bianca told me I should vote for McCain. Why? Because Obama made a promise to raise taxes. Bianca said we don't want more taxes because it's extra money that we have to pay. That sounds logical to me. But should I really cast my vote in the stead of an 8 year old?

Camille's birthday party was today. Her birthday was on September 23rd, she turned 6. I got her a stuffed animal. A big one. It's a horse. I think it's funny to give kids gifts that are bigger than they are. It was a prize from Dave & Buster's, and it took a long time to earn enough tickets for the stuffed animals I had in mind. Mostly won tickets playing the Jumpin Jackpot. Very tiring. I finally got the jackpot in the end. I rule. Then when I asked about the horses, I asked if there were any in the back of a different color, as I didn't think black or gray would go over well with Camille. And the lady tells me there's a slightly smaller one, 2000 tickets cheaper than the ones on display. So I got a nice brown horse which is still very large, and wasted about two hours in Dave & Buster's. Oh well. Gave her the horse a week or two early. She really liked it. Said she slept with it and took it with her in the bathroom. Now I can't touch that horse. Germs.

Her birthday party was at Bounce U. It's an indoor place with large inflatable.. things. The same stuff that they make moonwalks from. There was a large slide, an obstacle course, a boxing ring with oversized boxing gloves, and an arena for throwing foam balls at each other. I tried several times to run up the large slide, but couldn't make it to the top before the slippery surface caused me to fall. The adults had a relay race that I participated in. Through the obstacle course, climb up the stairs of the slide, slide down, and run back to tag the next person. For the first set, I was paired with my cousin Edward. He went first, and gave us a lead in the beginning. But my opponent gained the lead at the beginning of the slide. There's only enough room for one person to go up the stairs of the slide at a time; it's a narrow opening beside the slide part, with inflatable steps and a strap along the side to go up. I was pretty sure it wouldn't be legal to drag his leg to pull him down and climb over him, so we lost. Next relay race was of two teams of three, but all the kids were playing in the obstacle course. It was declared by one of their parents, that the kids would simply act as more obstacles of the course. A little crazy? Maybe Filipinos just have a strong belief in the toughness of their kids. Nobody got injured, and my team won the race. Hooray.

So later on the adults were teasing me. They were all talking in Tagalog, and I said to Edward, "They're all talking in code." So one of them translates the previous story into English. And Mau tells me, "I'll teach you something. Say 'maganda ka'." I happen to know 'maganda', so I guess the other part and reply "very beautiful"? (It actually translates to "you are beautiful.") She says "Ooh thank you!" and one of the guys asks if I think she's pretty. Which is not something I thought would be good to answer either way. Then they start telling me she's single, BUT has a kid, and that I'm "looking for a girlfriend, right?" For some reason, Edward chimes in and says that I take really good pictures. Which leads to them talking about how Mau should pose for some nude pictures, and that her photos would need some digital rendering. They're a fun, silly bunch. Definitely didn't expect that line of dialogue at my 6 year old niece's birthday party.

Pinata

2008-10-02T12:43:00.000-07:00

Why is it that ham comes from pigs, but hamburgers are from cows?

Applying to a lot of jobs through careerbuilder.com and I find that there are very few openings available to people with no experience or degree. I probably should've taken the oppurtunity I had a few months ago. Oh well.

Maybe I should look for jobs in other fields. I think welders get a decent wage. I can weld.

With my abundant free time, I'm considering finally making myself a Halloween costume. I was telling Bianca about my idea to make a costume using papier-mâché, and she said I could be a pinata. My original plan was to make molds of my head and have an extra head or two coming out of my shoulders. But the pinata along with a baseball bat as a prop would be a more humorous approach. However, I would be much less mobile. And I might be subject to random whacks to my person.

Bianca has a surprising knowledge of colors. Two years ago when I asked what her favorite color was, she said fuschia. What kind of 6 year old kid knows of the color fuschia? The other day, I asked her what color her shirt was. I expected her to say blue. But she answered with the more accurate answer, turquoise. I definitely didn't know these things when I was 8. My world only consisted of the primary and secondary colors, plus white, black, brown, and pink. There was nothing beyond or between that. Perhaps in time, I shall train her to be an artist.

Conspiracy. ch1 s1

2008-09-28T22:21:00.000-07:00

(Title is subject to change)

"They're following me."
"What? Who is following you?"
"Some guys in sleek suits. They're very careful and don't want me to know they're watching, but they're everywhere."
"Some stalkers? I told you man, if you don't get a girlfriend soon you're going to be sending out some homosexual vibes. If that's all this is, we could've done this over the phone. It was a long drive. You better pick up the check when we're done."
"Shut up and listen to me. I think it's the government, they're after me. I needed to talk to you in person, they might be listening to my phone calls."
"Which government? And why would they be after you?"
"Not so loud! They might hear you. I don't know what government, but they're always there, they seem to be following me all the time. Act casual."
I wasn't sure what to think. Michael was acting stranger than usual and seemed very agitated. I started to slowly look around the room for anybody that looked suspiciou...
"No! What are you doing? Look at me! You can't let on that you know we're being watched. I don't know what they're capable of, and I don't want to find out."
"Ok. Tell me what this is all about. Why would they be interested in you?"
"I can't say. The less you know, the better off you'll be. But I need your help."
"Whatever. I'll help you out, but if I find out you're just messing with me, you'll owe me more than lunch. What do you need?"
"Your car and some cash. I need to disappear for a while. If I can lose them, maybe I have a chance."
"Are you insane? I'm not giving you my car. What's wrong with your car?"
"I think my car has been bugged and is being tracked. It's not safe anymore. We'll switch cars and you'll throw them off my trail. Since you don't know anything, maybe they won't do anything to you when they realize you're a decoy. By then I'll have a good head start."
"That's ridiculous. Your car is worthless to me. Where are you going? If you really don't want to drive your own car, you can drive mine. But I'm coming with you."
"No, it's not safe. I don't want to involve you in this, it's too dangerous. Just give me your car and some cash. I'll pay you back when I can."
Michael glanced past my shoulder and an intense look came over his face. It was panic.
"Listen to me and do exactly as I say. They're here. I think they're going to make a move."
"Why do you think that?"
"The guy behind you just pulled out a gun."
I instinctively jumped out of my chair and started running for the front door.
Michael yelled, "Idiot! I had a plan! Start the car!"
I ran into several people and knocked over a few chairs and tables. Everyone else in the restaurant started running out too. Whether it was because they saw a man with a gun, or because they saw us running, I don't know. Michael ran towards the back door. I made it to my car and got the engine going. I opened the passenger door for Michael, and could see him running from the back of the building. Nobody was chasing him. Luckily, his pursuer must have gotten stuck in the chaos. Michael jumped into the car.
"Charlie! Drive!"
"I'm going to kill you later for this!"
I drove out and rushed towards the nearest freeway. I didn't stop for any lights or signs, I just drove through everything I could. There were honks and screams from the cars behind us, but we didn't care. Better to have some strangers angry than to have us dead. When we went through a red on 22nd and Main, a car almost crashed into us. I sped up to avoid the impact, and the other car swerved to only graze our back bumper. The truck in the next lane ran into them, causing the whole intersection to be blocked with subsequent collisions.
"Good. That should slow them down."
"Ok Michael, we're about to get onto the freeway. It's time for you to explain why you got me into this."
"I told you, it's not safe for you to know. Just drive."
"The hell it isn't safe! I don't care what you say, I almost died back there and have no idea why! Tell me what's happening."
"Just trust me, it's not safe. After we drive a while, you can drop me off and I'll get a car. Then you can go home and forget about me."
"Fine, we'll do it your way. How far do you want to go?"
"I'm not sure, at least an hour or two after we lose the guy that's tailing us."
"The guy in the restaurant? We lost him back there, there was nobody behind you when you got in the car. And nobody could've gone through that intersection after us."
"Not him. The black car to the left lane, five vehicles behind us."
"What!? Why didn't you say something earlier?"
"I thought you knew."
I had calmed down from my initial panic, and had slowed down without realizing it. But now I sped up, taking my car to the limits of what it was capable of. The adrenaline was flowing through my body, and I was shaking hysterically. I couldn't understand why Michael would come to me for something like this. I am the worst person to have around in an emergency. I was probably the only person that might have let him use my car. Really should've just given him the car. Didn't think my life would be in danger back then. Now I'm stuck in the middle of his troubles, and he won't even tell me what I'm risking my life for. All I could think of was the events of the day, and it replayed in my mind over and over again.
"I can't see that black car anymore. I think we lost him."
"Hey Charlie, pull up next to that truck and open the window."
I slowed down to keep pace with the truck, and opened the window for Michael.
"Give me your cell phone."
I handed him my phone, and he threw it in the back of the truck along with his.
"What was that for?"
"They must have been tracking me by using my phone. That should throw them off for a while. I hope that truck is going somewhere far away."
"Why did you have to dump mine too?"
"If they saw your face, they might look for you to get to me. We don't know if they got a good look at you, but if they did, it's best to be cautious."
"Michael, if you drag me further into this, I'll kill you myself."
"That's fine with me. Take the next exit, we'll need more gas."
We filled up the gas without incident. Switched drivers because I was getting tired. It had already been two hours since we fled the restaurant, but it felt like we had been running for an entire day. I was physically exhausted and my head was spinning with everything that happened. I started to fall asleep as Michael drove. The sky was getting dark and night was falling. We didn't have a destination, just a lot of places where we didn't want to be. For now, we were safe. And with that thought of hope, I was able to fall asleep.
When I woke up, it was already morning, just a few hours before sunrise. Michael was still driving, and we were going fast. His body was rigid and his eyes were bloodshot and glazed over. He must have been driving for over nine hours straight.
"You ok? I think we can go somewhere and rest. We lost that black car a long time ago."
"We can't stop. They're everywhere. The dark blue car five cars back is following us."
"That's impossible. We lost them a long time ago, and we dumped our phones. They can't track us anymore. How long has the blue car been following us?"
"Since a few minutes ago. Before that, it was another car. They keep switching vehicles and drivers so that we don't suspect them. They want us to feel safe and stop. But they can't trick me like that."
I suddenly realized that Michael had gone crazy. And for a while, he had taken me with him. I had been acting according to his fears and got wrapped up in his panic. But there was the man in the restaurant that pulled out a gun. I can't ignore that.
"Michael, what kind of gun did the guy in the restaurant have?"
"I don't know, I didn't see it."
"Then how do you know he pulled it out?"
"He reached into his suit, and was holding something. He was starting to pull it out when we ran."
Yes. Definitely crazy. We caused a panic clearing everybody out of the restaurant, created a multiple car collision, and drove hundreds of miles towards the middle of nowhere. Now I was hours away from home, with a lunatic behind the wheel. I had to do something to make things right. But it was obvious that I couldn't restore his sanity myself. He was too far off the edge to be pulled back by me. I would need to take him to psychiatric professionals.
"Ok Michael, this is what we have to do. Switch over to the lane farthest to the left. Then when we near the next exit, cut across all the lanes, and take the exit. The car tailing us will either get stuck and miss the exit, or won't see us past all the other cars and will chase a ghost for several miles. We'll fill up more gas, and I'll take over driving so you can sleep."
"That's a good plan Charlie. Now you're thinking straight."
I don't know what got Michael so spooked that he's become like this, but I'll get him fixed. As soon as he falls asleep, I'll look for a psychiatric ward and have him committed. I need to solve this before he drags more people into his psychosis. I'll fix everything.

to be continued..

The bum

2008-09-28T19:21:00.000-07:00

i scream without a sound,
i sing without a tune.
my hands touch the ground,
feet planted on the moon.
i live in a place
that has no name,
and smile with a face
that holds no shame.
i exist in a memory,
found lost in thought.
floating on a melody
time nearly forgot.
i fly with fish
and swim with birds,
often use language
that is quite absurd.
neither here nor there,
dancing in the wind.
i'm wandering without care,
with a silly little grin.

So I've decided to create a new blog. The old Xanga account is too cluttered, and I don't like the look of the Xanga homepage.

Anyway, I am currently a bum. Looking for work as a CAD drafter. Computer Aided Design. I would be the guy that would draw designs for buildings on the computer, based on the sketches of other people. Ideal job for a guy like me who has extensive experience with photo editing programs and a general inclination towards any sort of drawing. I took classes to learn AutoCAD and MicroStation, the main two programs for drafting that most big companies are using now. So now I'm just looking for a job.

For a while I was just generally wasting time in this period of inactivity. Watching anime, reading manga, playing online games, watching movies and television. And more than anything else, I visit my cousin Edward and his kids Bianca and Camille. There were times when I visited them several days in a row. Those kids never get tired of me. They're 8 and 6 now, and enjoy playing computer games and video games. They take tae kwon do classes, and are as active as little monkeys. They both like being carried (approximately 50 lbs and 30 lbs) and spun around. That gets tiring for me, but I think it's good exercise; and for them it's "totally awesome". There will probably be stories about them later on.

Some recommendations:
anime: Samurai 7, Claymore
manga: Black Lagoon
movies currently in theatre: The Dark Knight, Burn After Reading
television: Prison Break, Heroes. Both of these can be watched online to catch up.

I've decided to be more productive and will begin on a few projects soon. There are several projects that I've been putting off for a while, and it's time to get those done.
-Aunt Sally wants a charcoal portrait of herself. Requested a few years ago. Progress: 0%. I somewhat started, but the paper got bent, so I have to start over.
-Painting for Kristel. She probably doesn't remember, and I don't know how long ago it was requested. I started and got pretty far, but the colors are off and it needs a lot of work.
-Ling's pictures. Need to edit and upload, but my computer is on the fritz.
-Update Siror website. I need to change some text, remove some pictures and add some others.
-Children's book about butterflies. I have the text done, but I haven't started on the illustrations. It's going to be watercolor over ink.
-Edit old film scans. After I edit these, I can print them large for future framing and display.
-Shoot some positive film for slides. I have a lot of rolls of positive film that I need to use before they go bad. Positive film is the opposite of negative film.
-Teach Bianca and Camille how to paint
-Wood carving. I have a few ideas in my head. I just have to find my carving tools.
-Ice drawings. New concept I came up with, will explain below.

So I recently came up with an idea to do ice drawings. Here's the general process:
1. Make a wooden frame and line the inside with a waxy substance.
2. Place the wooden frame on top of a plastic base.
3. Mix food coloring with water to make different colors.
4. Use a few drops of the colored water to draw a small portion of the image on the plastic base.
5. Freeze the whole thing.
6. Repeat 3-5 until the piece is complete.
7. Remove the piece from the plastic base and the wooden frame.
8. Photograph, then freeze indefinitely for storage.

It's a slow and tedious process, but I think it will be a unique and worthwhile medium.

I'll be writing the beginnings of a short story or novel here. We'll see how that goes.